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Deconstructing faith doesn’t have to mean losing it. In this blog based on my Spiritual Homesteading podcast, I talk about how you can walk away from religion and still walk with Jesus.

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Why People Are Walking Away from the Church

Let’s be honest: for many of us, the Church feels like it’s lost its way. Whether it’s harmful theology, hypocrisy, or outright abuse, church hurt is real. And I get it—when a place that was supposed to offer healing ends up being the source of pain, the natural response is to walk away.

But I want you to ask yourself: Are you walking away from Christ, or just from Christianity?

Because the two are not the same.

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Christianity ≠ Christ

Let me explain it this way: being part of Christianity isn’t the same as being in a relationship with Christ. Just like being American doesn’t mean you have to be affiliated with a particular political party, following Jesus doesn’t mean you have to subscribe to everything that happens under the banner of “Christianity.”

If the Church has hurt you, it’s okay to take a step back. But don’t throw the baby (Jesus) out with the bathwater.

You had one bad meal at a restaurant—you’re not going to stop eating, right? In the same way, one (or many) bad experiences with Christians doesn’t mean Jesus Himself is guilty. You’re not rejecting Him—you’re rejecting misrepresentation.

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Purity Culture and Cancel Culture: Two Sides of the Same Coin

Now, let’s talk about purity culture. I’m not talking about the old-school virginity sermons. I’m talking about the broader culture of perfectionism that demands people be spotless to be accepted.

We’ve adopted a mindset—both in and outside the Church—that if something (or someone) isn’t perfect, it must be canceled. But that’s not how Jesus works. That’s not how grace works.

No person, no country, no movement, no faith system has ever been perfect. Ever. We all fall short—whether we live by religious standards or personal ones.

So if you’re walking away from Christianity because of its flaws, I understand. But make sure you’re not also walking away from the only One who actually lived without flaw—Jesus.

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You Can Keep Jesus and Let Go of Religion

Think about this: would you want someone to reject a relationship with you because of your sibling’s bad behavior? Of course not. So why are we doing that to Jesus?

The Church is full of flawed people (just like every other institution). But your faith is not defined by those people. You are the CEO of your own soul. You get to decide how your spiritual business is run.

So if someone else’s Christianity is sketchy, that’s between them and God. Don’t let it dictate your relationship with Jesus.

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What the Early Church Got Right

If you need a reminder of what the Church could be, read the book of Acts. It wasn’t perfect, but it was powerful. People shared meals, supported each other, and made sure nobody went without.

That’s the Church at its best—Spirit-led, people-loving, and deeply communal. That’s the vision I’m holding onto. Not what we’ve built in its place.

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Final Thoughts: You Can Still Follow Jesus

So here’s what I want you to remember:

• You don’t need to be part of a perfect church to follow a perfect Savior.
• Your faith is yours—no one else gets to run it.
• Jesus is not the same as Christianity, and He’s not afraid of your questions.
• The Church may have let you down—but Jesus hasn’t.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you. My goal isn’t to force a belief on you. It’s to invite you into a space where you can heal, question, and reconnect with the Jesus who loves you—no matter how messy your faith looks right now.

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